Tales Of A Typical Lagos Boy – Episode 2


(New WhatsApp message)

SHE: Who is this, please? 

ME: It’s me… The guy who you gave your number to at the basketball pitch today…

SHE: Ohh, Uhm… I gave my number to about seven or eight guys today. Which one of them are you?

ME: 😳 Wow… Seems you are not the kind of lady I thought you are

SHE: Do you even know me? See, don’t stress me, becuz I’m not looking for any relationship with anybody…

SHE: typing…

( You have successfully blocked this number from your WhatsApp and phone book)


I love the estate I live in. Apart from the tranquility and every single environmental feature to make you feel as though you are on the Island of Lagos, I can clearly estimate that two-thirds of the people in the estate where I live are Youths or young couples.

Maybe because I’m the indoor type. I work remotely most of the time, so I don’t get to see my co-occupants. But really, each time I decide to do early morning jogging or evening basketball training, I meet and greet more young people than grannies.

Tales of typical lagos boy

Speaking about evening basketball training, I had waited for three terrible weeks just to watch the two popular basketball teams of the estate compete. The lockdown has had it postponed for days, and then weeks and then months.

But that particular Tuesday was the D-day. So long waited…

As usual, I was on my blue jersey and white shorts, in support of my favorite team. I really look cute on those wears. My neighbors confirmed this countless times.

The basketball pitch is not far from my block in the estate. Just a few minutes of trekking. I usually go with some guys whenever it was training days, but on this Tuesday, ‘some guys’ decided not to show up for some reason that I don’t know.

I went alone and enjoyed every bit of the match. Although, the team I supported lost the match but the experience was worth it. Not too much crowd showed up, which is quite understandable.

Honestly, I can’t explain in detail how I walked up to one lady with oversized eyeglasses but I can recall helping her to take a portrait with her phone.

You should have an idea on the usual kind of conversation that ensues after you do a lady a little favor, shey?…

Na so naa, as a Lagos guy! *Winks*

She was a bit shy but I managed to collect her phone contact. I told her I’m a very busy person and I may even forget I ever met her. She smiled and told me she lived outside the estate but her brother is among the players at the match.

” That’s cool. I’ll give you a call when I get home. My name is Ashe” I said cheerfully, wanting to shake hands but remembering the no-handshake Covid-19 directives. So I simply delve my hands into my warm pocket.

“Oh nice. I’m Erica. Nice to meet you A…As…”

“It’s Ashe… As in ‘harsh'” I corrected with a wide smile.

We departed and went our separate ways. I’m sure she was impressed by my eloquence and charisma. Erica is blessed with an hourglass shape and spotless skin tone. Maybe that was what made me sustain convos with her in the first place. LOL

It was after I had eaten dinner that I remembered about Erica. I really can’t tell why I took it as a responsibility to call her. Well, since I had her contact, there was a point in doing so.

I grabbed my phone from the dining table and scrolled to my phone contact app.

It seemed stressful to begin to search for the name ‘Erica’, so I simply texted her name into the search bar.

It was then I realized that I saved her number as “Erica Basketball“. Very funny.

I chuckled. It was not stupid though. After all, I’ve seen it when my sister stored a stranger’s phone number with “Chinedu gas station”. Like, WTF!!!

Anyway, the last thing I wanted was to call the number and hear a female voice saying “invalid” or “unavailable” or “switched off“… Girls can be a scam, you know. (No shades, please)

So I decided to send a WhatsApp message to the number to avoid a broken ego. I spent about 10 minutes thinking of how to structure my first ever WhatsApp message to Erica.

I wrote and re-wrote

In the end, I only sent a sticker of a cute cat with the inscription “Hello pretty

After a few minutes, just when I was about dropping the phone, she replied…